Augusta National is paradise to golf fans, but paradises aren’t immune to the pandemic. This week was supposed to be Masters week; that week will now be in November. A fall stroll down Magnolia Lane will be majestic in its own ways should that come to pass, yet there’s a palpable void without the sweet tones of Dave Loggins and gratuitous azalea panoramas.
But while the coronavirus cancelled the PGA Tour’s rite of spring, Golf Twitter’s spirit is a bird that cannot be caged. Which is why social media stood up in one voice on Thursday and shouted, “You may take our Masters, but you can never take our Charley Hoffman jokes!”
Hoffman, of course, is the affable PGA Tour pro who’s enjoyed a solid career, with four Tour wins and more than $US28 million in earnings over 398 starts. But when it comes to the first round of a Major, especially the Masters, Hoffman transforms into 2000 Tiger Woods, only with the short game of Bobby Locke and gusto of Roy McAvoy. Since 2015, no one has enjoyed a lower Thursday scoring average (68.4) than Hoffman at Augusta – remarkable, since his best finish is a T-9 in that span.
Which is why everyone made the exact same joke on Twitter Thursday morning, and we can’t fault them. What we need right now is a little return to normalcy, and Chuck Hoffman is more than happy to serve as that conduit.
Masters week day 4: charley Hoffman day edition. Gonna get all my work before noon and shock the world. I will drunkenly stumble through my Friday afternoon follow up calls and MC.
— 3Wiggle (@WiggleThree) April 9, 2020
Even though there is no Masters being played right now, Charley Hoffman is somehow still in the lead.
— Jay Busbee (@jaybusbee) April 9, 2020
Having no Masters this week is finally going to sink in when I can’t look at the leaderboard around 11:30 Thursday morning and see Charlie Hoffman leading.
— Justin Barrow (@barrowthepirate) April 9, 2020
https://twitter.com/BANDURAK/status/1248142826170454017?s=20
https://twitter.com/kjmetcalf33/status/1248258399114014720?s=20
Front: how I feel rn
Back: how I would feel if Charley Hoffman was in his rightful place atop the Masters leaderboard today pic.twitter.com/wrDctKviRr
— TD (@td445544) April 9, 2020
You get the idea. Damndest thing is, Hoffman isn’t in this year’s Masters field. Of course, while other tournaments happen once a year, the Masters is forever, which is why Hoffman and his Thursday dominance is a light that can never be turned off.