9 things that should be banned from golf

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Earlier this week the USGA sent out a notice that green-reading materials could soon be prohibited. Which made us wonder: what else should be banned from golf?

1. Plumb-bobbing

  Know why so few guys on tour do it? Because it doesn’t work.

2. Tour bags for non-tour players

These are usually held by the golfers who want to be taken seriously. Sadly, it has the opposite effect.

3. Obnoxious bag tags

We get it, you played Pebble Beach seven years ago. Keep that memento in your den, not on your bag.

4. Score counter


If you lack the ability to count to eight, this tacky device won’t get the job done, either.

5. Out of bounds

Golf is slow enough as is. Speed things up by painting those white stakes red.

6. Professionals keeping their own score

There’s this new thing called a “scoreboard” that does the job quite well. Besides, you don’t see LeBron James asking Steph Curry how many points his team scored in the second quarter. It would be chaos out there.

7. Pants


This is Australia. It’s laid-back and HOT! Any club that has a pants-only dress code is a course you don’t want to play.

8. “Mashed potatoes!” fan

I hate this guy.

9. Aussies who wear Collingwood guernseys at Augusta

An Aussie tour group stood out like a beacon at this year Masters. Why? One of them was wearing a Collingwood guernsey. AT AUGUSTA NATIONAL. Disgraceful. Of course, any other team would have been acceptable.